It comes as no surprise that often, fear stands for false events appearing real. While most people accept this saying as an indisputable fact, sometimes this suggested feeling may be real. In life, at times, we have perfectly good reasons to be afraid. But why this emotion influences so many of us?
What is fear anyway? Is it real? Does it exist? What are you afraid of? Do you try to avoid fearful events? Or do you face them?
The acronym F.E.A.R stands for False Events Appearing Real, which indicates that most of what you are afraid of does not ever happen in reality. For the most part, fear, as you know, is provoked by emotions, and not rational thinking. In my humble opinion, many emotions are often exaggerated because most people exploit it as a scapegoat for not wanting to do something.
What is Fear?
Each of us knows fear. It can come quickly or suddenly and throw everything into great confusion, yet it can also save your life. While we can describe the feeling as a natural response to physical danger, it can also be self-created. You may also experience and generate feelings such as the fear of what others might think, have no control, fail, be different and so on.
And there is also a fear of death, the future, and love. You may be afraid of being generous because you think you will not have enough. Or you might avoid love because you are scared of ‘being rejected.’ And you do not trust yourself or anyone because a lack of self-confidence dominates you.
However, fear always seems to appear real when you experience it; even though it is not happening now. So, in reality, it has no real substance. You create it from the way you feel which makes you hang on tight to what you know and is familiar to you. Those kinds of fears are unhealthy!
A Little Story of Fear
Let me tell you the story of the person whose neighbors had a bulldog. When that person came home every day, that dog would chase after him for about half a block from his house. He would be so scared that he would run, with the animal on his heels. But one day, he got tired of it, so this time around, he decided to face the dog.
On that day, the bulldog came out of nowhere and began to run after him. The man saw a rock, stopped, picked it up, wanting to throw it at the dog. But when the bulldog came closer and started barking at him, the man saw that the dog had no teeth in his mouth. So, all of a sudden, his fear disappeared and became pointless.
It comes to show you that most people run through life being scared. They are running afraid of things that have no teeth in them. Maybe, fear also stands for First Effort Against Risk and not just for false events appearing real. So, instead of letting your fear get the best of you, find out how to fully experience it.
When You Experience Fear
Now, just for an instant, think of something frightening. Then let your body be fearful. What do you feel? In general, most people are on the defensive. So, you may say that the direct influence of fear is to close all systems down and to shut off your heart.
In that same instant, your heart pumps your blood full of adrenaline which quickly rushes through your veins. At this point, some people will freeze on the spot while others will take action or fight back. So, you can get scared, angry, act, run or hide.
But you need to understand that as long as you push away, deny or ignore fear, it will hold you captive in his dungeon. It will keep you emotionally frozen, unable to go forward in life. There, it stops you from having feelings and closes your heart from anything good happening again.
Embracing Fear Instead
When you embrace fear instead, your heart starts to open. And as you overcome it, you get to know it and take it by the hand so that it can become your friend and ally. When you learn to tame fear in some ways, you can use it as a purpose to go forward rather than as an excuse to stop or retreat.
So, study and use its feeling regularly as a green light to signal you on what you should do. The chances are that when you were a child, you found fear in foolish things such as the boogeyman under the bed. But then you eventually ﬁnd out that the boogeyman does not exist anywhere except in movies or your head.
However, adults have also their “boogeymen” like the unknown, rejection, future, failure, success, and so on. But these boogeymen are a great indicator to take action as well. So rather than seeing fear as a signal to run, it has to become a sign for you to go and act. Remember that the more time you give to your fears, the stronger they grow.
Fear is a Sign to Act
Therefore, fear is not just telling you what to do; it also says when to do it. When you experience a concern, it shows you that the best time to take action is at that very instant. All the excuses in the world won’t change one simple fact, and that is: fear is a sign to do whatever it is you fear.
You have to learn to become fearless, and I agree, it is not an easy feat to accomplish at times. But, you might be amazed by how much stronger you become. And how much more conﬁdent you are to do new things and learn new skills.
We all fear the little voice inside us that says “I am scared.” Yes, it affects all of us. But, guess what? That statement is only true if you let take over and be true. However, imagine what could happen if you succeed in facing fear head-on. You might reap the rewards beyond your wildest expectations.
Make Fear Your Trusted Ally
I agree fear can be one of the most confusing emotions anyone can experience. And everyone fears something in life. Fear can stop people right on their track, and it can also prevent them from achieving their goals and dreams. However, it is what you do with the fear you have that distinguishes you from others.
Therefore, it only grows when you allow it to set you back. But it is a fact that you will always experience fear throughout your life. And yes, it brings you into the unknown as you start taking new actions and make different choices. However, to grow and go forward, you have to do so.
Remember that fear is not a bad thing or something to avoid. On the contrary, it is something you want to seek and embrace. It is some indication that you are doing what you need to move in the right direction. If you do not have some fear, then your life is too comfortable, and that will only get you more of what you have right now.
A Final Word on Fear
So, know how to face your fears. Do not feed them by backing off or giving them time to grow. Learn to use fear so that you exactly know what you need to do to overcome it and advance in your life.
All of the successful persons I know of use fear as a sign to decide which actions they need to take and provide the highest return. Every chance I get, I use it in my own life, even if sometimes I am afraid. It helps me to remain aware that I keep growing, progressing and expanding myself.
In conclusion, it does not always take money and surely never luck to create a great life. It only requires the ability to face your fears with courage and confidence. So, fear stands for false events appearing real, and it should be used to fuel your actions in life. Just learn to play with it.
Now, if your fears are stopping you in any way, get in touch, and we will talk!
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Sergei VanBellinghen, Founder & CEO of First-Class Lifestyle, currently a Personal Growth & Success Expert Consultant, using self-development techniques to help you succeed and have a better life. Visit my personal growth page or check who is Sergei